fbpx

How to Confront

Most people hate confrontation and will do anything to avoid it. When push comes to shove and they’re forced to confront, it is usually a negative experience. This leads to the ungodly belief that it’s better to just avoid conflict than to confront issues. But that is not true.

Unresolved conflict creates anger, which leads to bitterness. It ultimately poisons our marriages, friendships, church relationships, even employer/employee relations.

Words seasoned with God’s love become weapons that destroy Satan’s attempts to separate us.

Scripture strongly exhorts us to resolve conflict by confronting: “Moreover if your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault between you and him alone. If he hears you, you have gained your brother, (Matt. 18:15).” Biblical confrontation fosters healthier, more successful relationships. Here are a few steps I take to confront those who hurt me.

1. Have the right motives. Ask, What is my goal in confronting him/her? Is it to show that I’m right and they’re wrong? Is it to hurt them like they hurt me? Is it to control, intimidate, humiliate and dominate them? Your goal must be bigger than your personal differences.You should seek to love and honor him or her because they are as valuable and precious to God as you are. Seek to save your relationship and identify stumbling blocks in the way. The right motive will determine your success. Let the Holy Spirit cleanse you of selfish or faulty motives beforehand.

2. Own the problem. Since reconciliation is the goal, try to become the solution to the conflict. What can you do differently to help the other person react the same way? Even if that person’s actions were absolutely wrong, find a way to help them overcome their bad reactions. Listening to them, acknowledging their feelings and correcting their misperception of your intentions will go a long way toward resolving the conflict. Empathize with them and avoid being defensive or assigning blame.

Now here is the biggest part of owning the problem: Ask forgiveness for your part of the disagreement. This opens the door for the other person to acknowledge his/her wrong as well and reciprocate by asking your forgiveness.

3. Speak words of reconciliation. Make sure your words aren’t condemning, blaming, ridiculing or belittling, but healing. That disarms Satan, who was at the root of the conflict from the beginning. That person isn’t your enemy. See the real culprit and you’re well on your way to resolution. Words seasoned with God’s love become weapons that destroy Satan’s attempts to separate us. Guard your mouth.

4. Be a good listener. Listening attentively tells the other person you care. Let them tell their part of the story without interruption. Then ask him or her to listen to you.

Without the Holy Spirit’s guidance you won’t accomplish the right results. We need His presence to resolve any conflict. Before initiating the confrontation, ask the Holy Spirit to empower you to defeat Satan and give you His strategy to resolve the conflict. Don’t leave barriers between you and the people God has put in your life. Through confronting, unity is restored and releases God’s glory!


If this blog post has been a blessing to you, please let us know by leaving a comment below.

Hurt People Hurt People.

The greatest cause of divorce, church splits, family break ups and every kind of broken relationship is “hurt people”. What do I mean by hurt people? People with damaged emotions. They have been affected by family issues passed down by their ancestors; by hurtful things they experienced in childhood; and by their own wrong choices. I know that it’s impossible to go through life without some kind pain and suffering, but some people have had more than their share. These are the ones I classify as “hurt people”.

Hurt people are like time bombs waiting to implode or explode at the first sign of rejection.

Hurt people have certain traits in common such as: deep roots of rejection, low self-esteem, inferiority complexes, perfectionism, self-condemnation and a critical and judgmental spirit, to name a few. These ingredients are a recipe for troubled and broken relationships because the individual has an over-emphasized, magnified, self-centered awareness. An easily offended spirit dominates them.

It’s unintentional.

“Hurt people” hurt people, but not on purpose. The pain they suffer is beyond natural understanding and, because they are often misunderstood, they suffer rejection, adding to the pain they already carry. They look okay on the outside, so you can’t tell how deeply wounded they truly are. It’s like the old saying “you can’t judge a book by its cover”, but when you start reading a few chapters you can size up the whole book pretty quickly.

Hurt people are like time bombs waiting to implode or explode at the first sign of rejection and, if two hurt people are in a relationship together, it’s truly a formula for disaster! It’s just a matter of time until they’re at odds with each other and they’ll eventually separate. Or even worse, they may actually physically hurt/murder each other.

Both people are victims of their own hurts. So there are no winners… just losers. The wounds increase and the cycle just continues. Are you a hurt person?

Here are some identifying signs:

1. You have many broken relationships.

2. You control/manipulate your friends.

3. You’re critical and judgmental of people you are no longer in relationship with or who disagree with you.

4. The people you hang with think like you, so gossip is the foundation of the friendship.

5. Your friendships dwindle and your isolation grows. 

Remember, many people carry deep wounds, so you are not alone. It wasn’t your choice to be hurt, but you can choose to get healed. To fix anything you need to first admit that it’s broken.

Here are some suggestions:

1. For a season, avoid intimate, personal relationships and just work on allowing God to heal you. God is a great physician who can go where no knife can go.

2. Ask God to heal you from the inside out. He’s waiting for you to ask. Without faith you can’t receive everything God has already supplied for you.

3. Make staying in God’s presence a priority. Read His word. Pray in the Spirit. Become a worshipper. 

4. Finally, get prayer from the Healing Streams ministry. God wants you to stop being hurt and become healed!

How to Have More Good Days

Every one of us could testify that we have both good days and bad days and, unfortunately, most would say they have more bad ones than good ones. What determines whether our days are good or bad is what I call “core habits”.

Core habits can be good or they can be very destructive. Although we have both in our lives, they often go unidentified. We just go through our day without paying too much attention to our core daily habits, because we are too consumed with regretting yesterday and how we can change our tomorrow. We forget that in order to change the big picture (our destiny), we have to first change the small picture (today).

Remember satan, your enemy, wants you to be consumed with the urgent… not the important.

We all have good days and bad days, but ask yourself this question: What makes good days good and what makes bad days bad? Make a list of both on a piece of paper. Remember that the Bible says in Psalm 37:23, “The steps of a good man are ordered by the LORD, And He delights in his way.” By taking one step at a time, we get closer and closer to the fulfillment of our destiny.

Let me share with you some things that would make a good day for me. Maybe they’ll work for you as well:

  • Getting seven hours of sleep
  • Spending one hour in prayer, meditation and reading God’s word
  • Eating a healthy diet
  • Drinking one gallon of water
  • Exercising for one hour

It’s so important to write down the things that help you to have a good day. They become your daily strategy and will radically change your destiny. Now, if you look at your list and see that you are far from accomplishing it on a regular basis, add just one new core habit to your day instead of three or four.

I would say that if you implemented that one core habit 80% of the time for a month, you could consider yourself successful. You can then add another core habit, repeating the process until you have implemented all the core habits that make for a good day!

This strategy will help you to have good days most of the time, rather than just having a hit and miss experience. By reviewing your daily core habits and replacing the bad ones with just three or four good ones—one at a time—you could change your whole life around. Isn’t it worth the effort?

Again, if you just take the time today to review what makes a good day, you will begin the process of increasing the good days in your life and you also will be reaching your destiny. Remember satan, your enemy, wants you to be consumed with the urgent… not the important. Stop having bad days and start having good ones! It’s all in your power.


If this blog post has been a blessing to you, please let us know by leaving a comment below.

Breaking false boundaries

Boundaries are limits placed on us either by ourselves or outside forces. Strongholds in our minds cause false perceptions of what we can or can’t accomplish. They dictate to us how we can or can’t live. They are deceptions that distort reality and keep us away from the success in Christ for which we were created.

One of the greatest boundaries is fear. FEAR: False Evidence Appearing Real! I’m not talking about the natural fear we are born with that protects us from real danger, but—the spirit of fear that paralyzes and blinds us to God’s truth. Unfortunately, I see many people hindered in their walk with God because of it.

 “For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.”

Second Timothy 1:7 says, “For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.” This verse tells me that the kind of fear that creates worry, anxiety, phobias, torment, etc., comes from a spirit of fear. We don’t have to live that way, yet many accept fear as a way of life. Others deal with it through drugs. Today, prescription pills are the “quick cure” for those who suffer from fear. No wonder so many are addicted!

Here are some principles that will help you break the false boundary of fear.

1. Recognize that fear is a spirit. Luke 10:19 says you have been given dominion over every demon spirit that attacks you: “Behold, I give you the authority to trample on serpents and scorpions, and over all the power of the enemy, and nothing shall by any means hurt you.” Aggressively resist that spirit of fear by believing the word of Doctor Jesus. His prescription is the “gospills” (His words) and they aren’t addictive or mood altering!

2. Get to know God’s love firsthand. Fear creates tremendous insecurity. Someone else telling you that God loves you is not good enough. Only Gods’ love can make your heart trust God’s promises and cancel out Satan’s lies!

First John 4:18 says, “There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves torment.” Knowing the depth of God’s love brings security and the strength to resist the False Evidence Appearing Real. Be patient with yourself during this time of learning God’s love for you. Too many of us have fallen into self-hatred and condemnation because we didn’t understand this spiritual war.

3. Be very careful of the kind of books you read, TV shows and movies you watch. The wrong ones will just intensify your fears. This is war, so be disciplined about what you allow to enter your mind and spirit, because your eyes and ears are the gateways to those areas.

4. Understand the transference of spirits. You will become like whomever you hang around! Avoid spending time with fearful people. Why? Like spirits attract each other. It’s likely your friends have the same problems you do, so choose new friends who are walking victoriously with God.

Don’t accept a demon-controlled life, limited by false boundaries. If you do, they will place more and more limits on you. Meanwhile, Jesus already set you free! “Therefore if the Son makes you free, you shall be free indeed (John 8:36:).”

Fear can and should be defeated, but if you don’t contest it, it will become a full-blown phobia. Don’t open the door to a demon-controlled life, limited by false boundaries.…

Remaining stable in an unstable world

We live in volatile times. Things that were once icons, pillars and immovable structures are changing overnight. Long-entrenched governments topple in hours. Peace quickly turns into riots and war zones spontaneously erupt. Yet, today’s unstable times were prophesied thousands of years ago.

God speaks of a time (I believe we’re there now) when people will “call evil good and good evil”. At a time like this, people without deep convictions will change their values, standards and way of living like the wind. We inherit our beliefs from our parents which are then molded my popular culture and social norms. They are further affected by our intimacy (or lack thereof) with God.

Anchored in Truth

Giving in to the pressures of today’s worldliness will only lead to instability. Unstable people are not grounded in the truth of the Gospel because it hasn’t become the foundation of their lives. They don’t have the anchor of the word to give them a deeper conviction than the inferior and immoral beliefs they’re being bombarded with daily. They don’t realize that they lack a moral compass. As it says in Matthew 7:13b: “…wide is the gate and broad is the way that leads to destruction, and there are many who go in by it.” In other words, the majority opinion is most often wrong!

However, people with a biblical world view and strong faith in God are usually stable. They aren’t vulnerable to the changing morals of the world. Because their lifestyle is established on God’s word, they’re unfortunately branded as old-fashioned and out of touch with the times.

But Jesus says in Matthew 5:10&11: “Blessed are those who are persecuted for righteousness sake, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are you when they revile and persecute you, and say all kinds of evil against you falsely for My sake.”

The majority opinion today is anti-God and that mindset has crept into the 21st century Christian church. We have developed a compromised gospel to appease the marginal Christian and make friends with the world.

Preachers won’t speak biblical truth for fear of offending the very people they’re called to liberate with God’s word. The fear of the Lord has been replaced with the fear of man, but God is looking for people like you and me to shout from the rooftops what He has revealed in our hearts.

Will the real church please stand up!

Will the true church (Christ-like people) please stand up and be heard? God has not given us a spirit of fear but of power, love and a sound mind. Spiritual warfare is at its highest since the beginning of time because it’s Satan’s last stand. He is throwing whatever he has left at the church, but God is using this season to identify and hand-pick His remnant church to usher in the second coming of Jesus.

Please don’t give in. to the pressure that this upside-down world is throwing at you. keep standing! Ephesians 5:13 says: “Therefore take up the whole armor of God, that you may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand.”

Ask yourself, “Am I stable in my convictions concerning God’s way of life for me? Or am I easily swayed by the immoral standards that are intellectually and logically presented to me, even by our government?” God is looking for stable people in an unstable world to build his kingdom. What will your choice be?…

Don’t let your setback make you step back.

When it comes to our God-given dreams and visions, we all suffer setbacks from time to time. Remember that everything we do for God will be contested, challenged and resisted by the devil.

Too many of us get discouraged and give up when we hear a word from God, start to walk it out, but then face immediate frustration and failure. Sure it’s a setback, but it’s no reason for us to step back and give up on our God-inspired dream or promise.

Below I present some steps to prevent failure when pursuing God’s promises in your life.

1. Realize that you have an enemy.

But it’s really not Satan directly….it’s you. It’s the weaknesses of your own flesh (feelings and emotions). We must discipline ourselves to be influenced by God’s word rather than our circumstances. Second Corinthians 4:18 says, “While we do not look at the things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen. For the things which are seen are temporary, but the things which are not seen are eternal.” It takes daily discipline to die to our own ways, thoughts and feelings and stay focused on God’s promises.

2. Don’t assume the dream or vision was a lie.

If your strategy fails, it doesn’t mean that you’re a failure or the dream or vision isn’t from God.  Just change your strategy. The promises stay the same, but the strategies can change.

3. Understand that timing is everything.

When it comes to fulfilling God’s plans and purposes in your life, timing matters…a lot. Live on God’s time clock, not your own. Many people step back when things are not happening according to their time plan. They forget that Isaiah 55:8 says: “For My thoughts are not your thoughts, Nor are your ways My ways,” says the LORD.

Just wait on the Lord and trust that He knows what He’s doing. He always brings His promises to pass. Second Corinthians 1:20 puts it this way: “For all the promises of God in Him are Yes, and in Him Amen, to the glory of God through us.” Don’t quit on God….. He hasn’t quit on His Word that is in you.

4. Let God purify your motives.

Ask, “Why do I want this vision, dream or promise fulfilled in my life?” We can suffer setbacks because our hearts are still too filled with selfish motives. The advancement of God’s Kingdom should be our ultimate goal. I agree that we should prosper and enjoy divine favor—but not just for ourselves—for those we can influence in the present and future. God will put His dreams, visions and promises for us in a holding pattern because we have the wrong motives.

5. Forgive yourself if you stepped back.

God hasn’t changed His mind concerning His promises in your life. Don’t let discouragement turn into depression and stay in your life. You can always choose to once again embrace God’s dream, vision or promises.

Conclusion: No one is perfect, but God loves us and desires that we succeed in every way. So don’t give up or quit when you have a setback. Remember…setbacks are only permanent when you step back!


If this blog post has been a blessing to you, please take a moment to comment below.

1 11 12 13 14 15 16
WP2Social Auto Publish Powered By : XYZScripts.com